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You begin to tell yourself, I didn't sign up for this and maybe we were better off, just as boyfriend/girlfriend, because I did not think marriage would be like this. But once you actually say those words out loud to yourself or to your wife/husband one of you begin to think we can make this work.
Being Faithful in a marriage is just not about not cheating. If you define Faithful in the dictionary it says, loyal, being devote to a person, and honoring your vows. And we know that all of those things aren't just granted to us like we are queen and king on our high horses, but instead we have to put in work for those things.
Temptation is all around us. And I'm pretty sure you are saying I know this already, but the point I am making is if you really just look at how much you are tempted throughout the day, you would realize that temptation is strategy set in place to make us fall. In order words, it's all a trick of the enemy.
That's why you have to choose to be loyal, devoted, and make a choice to honor your vows. When we do get married we have good intentions in our hearts, but things happen. Like in a marriage it may frustrate you to keep telling your wife to keep her dirty clothes off the bedroom floor or it may frustrate the wife to tell her husband repeatedly every night, to rinse your plate after dinner. It's usually very small things that cause us to get into arguments and stay mad at one another. And that's really a temptation.
We have a choice to get mad every time we get irritated with our wife when she doesn't keep her dirty clothes off the floor or our husband when he never rinses his plate off at dinner. But we also have a choice to not get mad about the situation and instead handle it with a better response. You know when my husband doesn't pick his clothes up from behind the bathroom door after taking a shower, I could choose to yell at him or I can keep reminding him. Eventually, he's going to get tired of hearing me remind him to pick his clothes up and he is going to start remembering to pick the clothes up on his own. And when he learns how to do that very well, then I'll move on to something else that he does, that bothers me.
You know it's kind of like a child. You have to mold them and shape them into the person you want them to be. And the same holds true in a marriage. Marriages do not come with an instruction manually and you literally how to start from the baby steps with every thing you two go through, before you move on to the next thing.
Eventually, things in your marriage will begin to come together, but don't expect for them to be super perfect at the beginning. You two have to learn to love everything about one another and trust me, I know loving everything about my husband is hard, so I know it must be hard for you. But it is possible.
Do Not Give Off The Hint to Others, That You are Available
I go to the grocery it seems like everyday and I know men see my ring on my finger, but for some reason they still choose to flirt. As a married woman, it makes me nervous and I feel like some men don't respect marriages any more. However, the point I want to make is, if you every find yourself in this type of situation, you should never give the hint to another man or woman that you are available, because you are not.
Even though you and your spouse may be going through things, it is never a good ideal to fall into the temptation of hinting to someone else you are available. When I get hit on, I usually think to myself if this is happening to me, than it must be happening to my husband as well.
A flirt where someone tells you that you are beautiful, you have a great body, or your smile is pretty as the sun in the sky is not acceptable. You should ask yourself, do you want someone telling your spouse the same thing? Even someone smiling, winking, or giving you the eye is not acceptable.
If the enemy sees that you are falling for something as small as those things mention above, he's going to try to eventually take you out with something much bigger, that is beyond of what you can control. And I know that sounds like you have to just run the other way when temptation of flirting is around, but really that is exactly what I am saying.
Do Not Hide Your Marital Status With Anyone
Another way on how to remain faithful in your marriage, is to let everyone know you are married. You should use every opportunity you get to show off your husband or your beautiful wife.
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I have heard men say it is very easy to be faithful to their wives after the first couple years of marriage. I have also heard it is extremely hard for men to be faithful to their wife, because they want sex all the time with every attractive woman and if he is faithful it is, because he loves his wife very much. But if it is so hard than why get married in the first place?
The qualities of a good husband/wife can and must be identified before getting married. Good qualities make a marriage easier. When you get married you are one now and it is your responsibility to honor your vows.
Downplaying the significance of finding good qualities in a husband/wife can have negative effects. Since nearly half of modern marriages end in divorce, lowering expectations when looking for a husband/wife can mean the different between a lifetime of memories and a lifetime of regrets.